Many people do not understand the trauma of deconstruction... the change of beliefs, the loss of faith, or the change in our relationship to the church.
They think, "It's just rejecting stupid superstitions! How hard is that???"
But they don't know what we know: that these beliefs were born out of, nurtured, and produced profound spiritual and emotional experiences.
It's one thing to say, "I don't believe in that anymore!"
It's another thing to try to make us say, "My experiences and my emotions weren't founded on reality. Therefore, they were all false. My whole life was a lie!"
We can't say that. And I don't think we should.
I try to help people accept that their experiences were real and that their emotions were valid... that it's okay to embrace and own them for who we were at the time. They were real to us and enriched us in deep ways we weren't prepared to see.
Actually, looking deeper into our spiritual experiences and our emotional journeys offers keys into what stimulates our unique personal growth and nourishes our individual spiritual journeys.
Beliefs, for a time, can produce profound and productive qualities in us.
But, just because the seed dies (the belief), it doesn't mean the crop won't be bountiful (our lives).
In fact, the death of a belief is often what provokes important growth to a better wholeness.
(We talk about this kind of stuff all the time in our online community, TheLastingSupper.com ... you should come and join us there.)